A new concept album.

The title should give away the theme, and then some.

Especially if you speak ancient greek and can therefore understand the title of the suite.

This part is the obligatory instrumental introduction.

Starts with a soft bit, blippy synths, jazzy drums, soft pads and some noodley clean guitar solos.

Gets heavy in the second half.

I’ll explain it all when I get to the end of the set of songs.

As much as I can anyway.

MP3 is right here

Image demonstrated from here

A song about Boobie Wednesday.

I even made a video for it:

And here is the MP3

Lyrics:

Verse 1:
What is #boobiewed?
Why are tits in my twitter list?
I guess the wed means Wednesday
And funbags are really fun

Chorus:
It is Boobie Wednesday
So reach in and have a feel
Yes its Boobie Wednesday
Lets stop cancer cos tits are cool

Verse 2:
So on Boobie Wednesday
Make sure to check for lumps
And remind all your friends
Because cancer really sucks

Verse 3:
Boobs aren’t the only cancer
You can get it anywhere
So keep checking with your doctor
To find it and treat it well

The best way to deal with your addictions is to give into them in a controlled manner.

Click here for the mp3

Lyrics:

Verse 1:
Feel the burn in your brain
As your blood craves a taste
But you try to abstain
From what you once embraced

Chorus:
Compromise
Give into
Your weakness
Taste bleakness

Verse 2:
You might fight for awhile
As the flame burns the fuse
To resist is futile
For no one can refuse

Bridge:
Try to resist
It will insist
Try to desist
It will persist
As you protest
It will infest
As you detest
You will ingest

Image tempted from here

A normal straight up thrash metal song about killing posers and their crap music.

Except for all the bits that aren’t.

Click here to make the music go

Lyrics:

Verse 1:
I am coming forth
Set to start a war
On all those who pose
Those dumb fucking hos
Who pollute the world
With musical afterbirth

Chorus:
Bludgeoning, destroying
Crushing the weaklings
Death to electro

Verse 2:
Your bland 808
I will desecrate
Vocoder and autotune
Wreckage will be strewn
And your pretty face
I’ll grind into a paste

Pic decapitated from here

The title is a quote from the book To Hell And Back, by Lilith Saintcrow (the fifth and final title in the Dante Valentine series).

It is used to describe how a certain weapon feels.

As I was reading it I felt that it was a good phrase that sums up how I felt whilst finishing the book.

The song itself is…. weird. It is based around the D#/Eb Moorish Phrygian Scale with a 9/8 time signature, which those who understand what that means would know is not a basis for any kind of normal pop music.

In terms of instrumentation it is mostly synth driven, with a few guitar solos laid over the top in strategic places.

Genre wise, I think the music by Fear Factory, Liquid Tension Experiment and Frank Zappa I listened to last night might just have influenced the style. It ended up in some kind of weird avant-garde jazz fusion place with an industrial edge in the percussion.

Hence me calling it weird.

Listen to the mp3 here and decide for yourself

This should be interesting. Ground rules: One album per band, had to be released in 1/1/00 – 31/12/09, had to be new recordings (best of’s and remasters are excluded).

10. Slayer – God Hates Us All (2001): The best album Slayer released all decade. Filled with great memorable riffs and lyrics about God and religion and stuff that were really emphasised by the fact that the album was released on September 11 2001. More experimental than what had come before from them with more groove, different tunings and lyrics that were more based in reality. It might not be pure thrash, but it is still pure metal. When I want to listen to Slayer, I usually put on this album.

Fav Songs: Threshold, Disciple, Bloodline

9. Anthrax – The Greater of Two Evils (2004): Anthrax with their best vocalist (John Bush) recording their best songs from the 80s. No matter how great the classic versions were with the other vocalists these are better in everyway – better arrangements, better tones, better vocals. I’ve listened to this album so many times because its almost better than their greatest hits. All it needs is a second disc of Bush era songs and this would be the perfect Anthrax collection. As the cover says, this is スラッシュ　メタル (Surasshu Metaru – a transliteration of “thrash metal”).

Fav Songs: Deathrider, I Am The Law, Belly of the Beast

8. Tourniquet – Microscopic View of a Telescopic World (2000): Yes. This is a Christian Metal album, but it is technically brilliant in every way, except of course most of the messages of the lyrics. The drumming alone should get this album onto any playlist, but the songs themselves are great examples of Progressive Metal. Great riffs, complicated and unusual song structures, with enough variations in speed and timing and tone throughout to keep it interesting without being just for the sake of it. Plus there is the instrumental, Immunity Vector…. the flute solo in the middle still floors me.

Fav Songs: Besprinkled in Scarlet Horror, Immunity Vector, Erratic Palpitations of the Human Spirit

7. Metallica – St. Anger (2003): Hear me out on this. 1. I love the album. The grooves, the “tones” (even the drums), the lyrics all put forth a mood and a vibe of unbridled rawness. It isn’t polished for a reason. It is a complete deconstruction of everything that Metallica had been. It is an album of purgation, not of skill demonstration. 2. Metal as a whole would not be where it is today without this album. The backlash that it caused killed nu-metal and the no solos or skill movement. 3. The Unnamed Feeling is a better ballad than any they’ve done since Justice (and maybe even before), including that one you like.

Fav Songs: Some Kind of Monster, The Unnamed Feeling, All Within My Hands

6. The Dresden Dolls – The Dresden Dolls (2003): Completely unlike anything you’ve heard before, but still completely familiar. Amanda Fucking Palmer is a fucking genius. If you don’t have this. Go and get it. If you want to know what the future of music will be like in a post-label world, then look at what she is doing right now. Follow her on twitter, go and see her shows, tell your friends that there are still people who are making music for its own sake.

Fav Songs: Girl Anachronism, Coin-Operated Boy, The Jeep Song

5. Machine Head – The Blackening (2007): This album is why I picked the #7 that I did. This is a guitar driven thrash metal masterpiece that is better than anything that the older generation have produced in recent times. Headbanging heaven music from start to finish, with lyrics that actually have a message…. in the same vein as the best from the classic 3 Metallica albums (the blue, red and white ones) – its not just screaming about satan over the fastest riffs you can play (not that there is anything wrong with that, see #2).

Fav Songs – Aesthetics of Hate, Now I Lay Thee Down, Halo

4. Diablo Swing Orchestra – Sing Along Songs for the Damned & Delirious (2009): Its real simple. When I’m in charge I’m going to put this album on. Anyone who doesn’t feel an irresistible urge to dance gets a tattoo on their arm and then gets shipped off to a death camp. Swing Jazz + Metal + Awesomeness = This Album. If you’ve ever liked music, you need this album.

Fav songs: A Tap Dancer’s Dilemma, Bedlam Sticks, Vodka Inferno.

3. Dream Theater – Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence (2002): It was hard to pick which of their albums should get on this list, but I think this one beats the others they’ve released this decade (because Scenes from a Memory is their best and was from 99). It has everything Dream Theater are known for on the first disc, and then there is a whole concept album on top of that which is what really out it over the top. Now you could probably read something into the fact that I picked the concept album about mental illness, and why not, I like it because I identify with the lyrics.

Fav Songs: The Glass Prison, Misunderstood, and from the concept: The Test That Stumped Them All, Solitary Shell.

2. Cradle of Filth – Midian (2000): “Care for a little necrophilia?” This is the best album from CoF, and the best album to come out of the extreme metal world, at least in my pansy prog loving opinion. Every single song on this disc is great. Sure, my absolute favourite CoF song came on a different album, but this is their (and extreme metal’s) Black Album. A perfect package of pure evil.

Fav Songs: Lord Abortion, Amor E Morte, Her Ghost in the Fog, Tearing The Veil From Grace.

1. The Devin Townsend Project – Addicted (2009): The best thing Devy has ever done. It is still heavy metal but with a poppy edge that blows me away. Reminds me of my music, except that it is well written and actually produced. Big riffs, bigger hooks, and all the vocals from Anneke van Giersbergen make it my true album of the decade. If you pulled out all the parts of the previous 9 albums on this list that make them my favourites and distilled them into 1 package it would be this.

Fav songs: All of it.

A cover of the Christmas song, in a classic style.

Mostly.

Click here for the MP3

Image delivered by Santa from here

A brownie in traditional folklore is a type of elf or fairy or hobgoblin that helps out around the house.

Of course they could be mischievous at times, and I like the idea that every good thing has a dark side. No matter how good something appears to be, there is a capability for it to be evil.

The song itself is an instrumental based around some tribal beats, with some heavy grooving riffs and a lot of dissonance in terms of note and chord selections.

Click here for the MP3

And yes, that picture is completely unrelated…. but it looked tasty.

Image tasted from here

Its that time of year again, where various people throw out lists of the top 10 albums of the year. Usually they’re filled with whatever album that hit single the radio kept playing came from.

My list is a little different.

I think.

I don’t really listen to the radio, so maybe the top 40 stations are playing this stuff.

And maybe there is a Santa Claus.

Anyway, enough pseudo-hilarity, lets get to the list:

10. Les Claypool – Of Fungi and Foe: Bass for days. as you’d expect from a solo album from the weirdest bassist in the known (and likely also the unknown) universe. Lots of groove, lots of insane lyrics.

Fav songs: Red State Girl, Boonville Stomp, Primed by 29

9. Dream Theater – Black Clouds and Silver Linings: Their tenth album, sounds exactly like you’d expect. The main album is growing on me, but it didn’t really stand out at first. The second disc on the other hand, which is filled with covers of bands like Rainbow, Queen and King Crimson, is mindblowingly awesome – if it was the only disc it would be up in the top 5. Which is not to say that the album itself is bad, it just feels kinda “normal”. Hopefully they’ll step out of their comfort zone and do something really new and progressive on the next one.

Fav songs: Shattered Fortress, The Best of Times, All of the covers.

8. Megadeth – Endgame: The thrash album of the year. Much better than what Slayer put out (hence Slayer aren’t in this list). Buckets of fast riffs, face melting solos, and the conspiracy theory laden lyrics we’ve come to expect from Mr Mustaine. This is what you put on if you want to headbang until your neck hurts.

Fav songs: Dialectic Chaos, 1320, Head Crusher

7. Alice in Chains – Black Gives Way to Blue: This is the album you put on if you want to cry and headbang. Filled with everything that Alice in Chains was known for. Although I kinda wished that William DuVall, the new vocalist, sang more solo parts. At times it starts to sound a little too much like Jerry Cantrell’s Degradation Trip. Other than that, it has the heavy grooving riffs, it has the softer acoustic songs, and the title track with its piano part played by Elton John makes me tear up every time.

Fav songs: Check My Brain, Black Gives Way to Blue, A Looking In View

6. Mz Ann Thropik – S.O.S.: The only Australian band on my list (and frankly one of the few oz bands in my collection). Hard Rock at its best. Lots of great songs, and Mzzy can really sing in that rock chick way that I just love. The fact that she is probably the only artist on here that will read this post is just a bonus.

Fav songs: Cock-o-roach, Witch Hunt, Flesh Crawler

5. Steel Panther – Feel The Steel: Hair metal. Except all the innuendo and hints about sex are made completely fucking blatant. Every song reminds you of the style of the a certain band, and then lays on a big load of sleaze. It is simultaneously both a totally hilarious send up and a totally respectful tribute.

Fav songs: Death to all but Metal, Community Property, The Shocker

4: Kittie – In The Black: Totally heavy. Totally metal. Everything I’ve liked about Kittie turned to 11. The mix of vocal styles is awesome, Morgan finally has the confidence to sing better than most pop stars, and then she still growls like a banshee in the next line. The riffs are heavier than ever (and faster where they need to be), and they stick in my head unlike some from bands who didn’t make this list. Even the occasional guitar solos are good. Plus when that cowbell comes in on the bridge to Whiskey Love Song I just have to stop whatever I’m doing and air drum and headbang away.

Fav Songs: Whiskey Love Song, Cut Throat, My Plague

3. Mastodon – Crack the Skye: An album that you might have seen on some other lists (even that of Time Magazine). I heard about this album so much from various sources that I finally listened to the first single, and I had two thoughts: 1. I have to buy this 2. “Core” is dead. Progressive and Psychedelic…. but still totally heavy. The album to put on and get high to, or have sex to.

Fav songs: Oblivion, Crack The Skye, The Last Baron

2. Diablo Swing Orchestra – Sing Along Songs for the Damned & Delirious: Its real simple. When I’m in charge I’m going to put this album on. Anyone who doesn’t feel an irresistible urge to dance gets a tattoo on their arm and then gets shipped off to a death camp. Swing Jazz + Metal + Awesomeness = This Album. If you’ve ever liked music, you need this album.

Fav songs: A Tap Dancer’s Dilemma, Bedlam Sticks, Vodka Inferno.

And finally, our number one albums….

1. The Devin Townsend Project – Ki and Addicted: Yes, I’m a total fanboy. Yes, it might be cheating to give the #1 spot to two albums – but since they are part of a larger whole I think it counts.

Ki: A soft, delicate album. Ambient and progressive in the way that Pink Floyd can be on their more mellow songs. Lots of clean guitar. Lots of space for the notes to reverberate. Yet with a style that is unmistakably devy.

Addicted: Heavier, but with a poppy edge that blows me away. Reminds me of my music, except that it is well written and actually produced. Big riffs, bigger hooks, and all the vocals from Anneke van Giersbergen make it my true album of the year.

Fav songs: All of it.

That is it for now. Up soon will be my Best of the Decade list.

Also, it probably doesn’t take psychic powers to predict that the next 2 DTP albums (Deconstruction and Ghost) will be my favs next year.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming….

This song is in my “classic” style. Big distorted guitar riffs, pounding drums and bass, funky keyboards, multiple solos, big hooky chorus, and lyrics with a depressed attitude and a hint of paranoia.

Click here for the MP3

Image is not related, but from here

Lyrics:

Verse 1:
I want to join into
The true way and there stay
But I drift, form a rift
Between me and the sea

Chorus
Disconnected
Disaffected
Disadapted
Disrespected
Disdirected
Disadapted

Verse 2:
All alone they disown
Who I am with their sham
So I run to no one
For their greed I must bleed