If you’ve found this, then you are probably my stalker.

Anyway, I’ll do the theme updating thing soon. With a return to regular blogging from next week.

Take some xkcd, add a dash of beer and stir with the burning indignation that comes from marking exams all day and reading Ray Comfort on the way home. That will create these lyrics.

The music is 6/8 locrian madness (except for the bits the aren’t)…. and don’t ask me where the inspiration for it came from. You should know that my music may exhibit dynamics that are highly sensitive to initial conditions.

Get it here

Lyrics:

Verse 1:
Strange equations
In my mind
Pulling from
The intertwined
Lucid thoughts
Of life defined

Chorus:
Unleash…. Unleash the power of
Science…. For it will make all your
Paths straight….
So stand back….
I’m going to try science

Verse 2:
Chaos explains
The random world
Butterfly flap
And we’re hurled
In fractal ways
We watch unfurl

One. Fucking. Hundred.

Time for some oldskool thrash.

With cupcakes….

Get it here

Lyrics:

Verse 1:
Its time
Right now
For a
Degustation
Unleash
Flavours
On your
Imagination

Chorus:
Taste the tempting delight
Dessert of godlessness

Verse 2:
Chocolate
Covered
Logic
Celebration
Cupcakes
Coated
With gods
Eradication

Image nibbled from violet blue

A nice little ditty about astrology.

Click this link to see why I’d write a song attacking such a “harmless” superstition. Spoiler…. its not just because it is total bullshit (although that probably would be enough knowing my personality)

The song itself was easy to write, and the entire process was observed by my girlfriend. The verse is kind of slow and dense, slightly inspired by the music from the Mass Effect 2 Trailer. The song itself is in drop-D, which allowed some different chords to be used (9ths and 6ths), the verse riff has a nice slow groove…. typical of what I usually do in this tuning.

Get it here

Lyrics:

Verse 1:
Listen to magic forces
That pull us to and fro
Driven by magic forces
With knowledge to bestow

Chorus:
Retrograde
Accept your fate
Retrograde
The stars dictate

Verse 2:
Looking up to see downward
The houses and the signs
Astral bodies push us forward
Show us your designs

Bridge:
Astrology is not the way
Pseudoscience leads us astray
Astronomy shows us the way
True science reality ok!

Verse 3:
Hasten to changing of tides
Out with ignorance
Chasten by our true guides
Tested by science

Verse 4:
The future is not effected
By unrelated stars
Coincidences not connected
Listen to scholars

This is what happens when I go to an extreme metal gig.

It is an instrumental inspired by seeing Cradle of Filth live. Although it sounds completely unlike them. The interesting thing is that the whole song was built around dance beats. I’d pick a beat, and then write the music to go over it. It has a completely danceable groove for awhile, then a tremolo picked black metal riff for the bridge that leads into the surf guitar solo which takes us back to the groove….

The title is obviously taking the piss out of everything and everyone who is trve.
<cookiemonster>RAWR!!!!!1!!!one!!!1!</cookiemonster>

Image summoned from here

A nice long weird song.

But in a good way.

No lyrics, because everything vocal was improvised.

The first weird vocal bit is a form of throat singing.

The second weird vocal bit is my glossolalia (aka speaking in tongues aka gibberish).

A free beer (or similar beverage) to anyone who can guess the source of the intro sample.

Image licked from here

Get it here

A song with a slow and dirty groove. Driven by the bass.

Lyrically its looking more at atheism from more of the positive side of things. Plus it has a reference to not eating babies…. just in case you were still confused on that.

Lyrics:

Verse 1:
Free to live for ourselves
Wanting the best in the world
Sacred we draw from our loves
Driven to sensual delights

Chorus:
Welcome to rapture
Living for nature
Welcome to rapture
Making our own meaning

Verse 2:
Free to give of ourselves
Wanting to remake the world
Ethics we draw from our minds
Driven to do what is right

Bridge:
No gods
There are no gods
There are no gods
But we aren’t immoral
No gods
There are no gods
There are no gods
But we don’t kill ‘em all
No gods
There are no gods
There are no gods
But we aren’t demonic
No gods
There are no gods
There are no gods
But we don’t eat babies

Image liberated from here

Get it here

A song of prayer.

Now, don’t worry yourself I haven’t gone and unbackslidden (would that be frontslidden?). It was an actually an idea inspired by 2 different things, neither of which is me re-embracing Jesus Christ (or any other invisible friend) as my saviour.

1. Luke 18:9-14: The parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector, where the Pharisee (playing the campy bad guy role he is typically in) prays “God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector.”

2. Something that Dave the Happy Singer said on a recent podcast. I think it was the Skepticzone but it may have been Critical Mass. I didn’t take notes, and he’s lucky that I’m crediting him at all, this isn’t an essay or scientific paper after all*. Anyway, he said that something along similar lines to what the Pharisee prayed in the quote above would make for a good song.

This is that song.

Or at least my version of it**. Loaded with references to western elitism, religious hypocrisy and theological contradictions. Its twisted and dark and metal, just as you’d expect from me.

* – But I will accept the whole he who publishes first wins idea from such papers

** – Obviously if Mr. Happy Singer were to follow thru on his idea to write a similarly themed song it would be quite different. Possibly more happy. Possibly more singing.

Lyrics

Chorus:
Thank the lord that I’m not….
One of them

Verse 1:
Thank the lord that I’m not
Born into a foreign land
Living in poverty
Living in some kind of hell
Thank the lord that I’m not
Forced to hunt for my bread
Forced to steal internet
Made to be a criminal

Verse 2:
Thank the lord that I’m not
A member of the weaker sex
Submissive and repressed
Built to learn in silent meekness
Thank the lord that I’m not
A backslider or unsaved
A cursed jew or muslim
Or a goddamned atheist

Verse 3:
Thank the lord that I’m not
Struck down by disease
AIDS, cancer or leprosy
Birth defects or insanity
Thank the lord that I’m not
Killed by a volcano
Or washed away in a flood
Or destroyed by gods evil!

Image blessed from here

Get it Here

This song is an awesome work of genius.

I know that the intelligent and witty types don’t think that, but what could be more ironic than a song about irony completely failing to include any anecdotes that meet the correct definition of irony?

Plus I just love Alanis…. possibly because of my as yet unexplained Canadian attraction thing.

Of course, my version sounds completely unlike her versions…. as you’d expect. Especially that riff I open it with (a free drink to the first person to recognise where I “borrowed” it from). Don’t ya think?